"I am Free"

“I am free…” I find these three words one of the most chilling phrases in the scriptures:

And Cain went into the field, and Cain talked with Abel, his brother. And it came to pass that while they were in the field, Cain rose up against Abel, his brother, and slew him.

And Cain gloried in that which he had done, saying: I am free; surely the flocks of my brother falleth into my hands. (Moses 5:32-33, emphasis added)

We all know this story. Cain committed the first murder, and after committing the heinous act, he ironically believed he had found new freedom. In the world today, I wonder how often we incorrectly believe we are “free” when making poor choices. A few examples come to mind. I think of a person getting high on illegal drugs thinking he or she is now “free” from pains of the world. I have seen many news stories of people (e.g., Mark Hacking, Scott Peterson, etc.) who kill a spouse to become “free” rather than get divorced. Students cheat to prevent the bondage of a failing grade. Some people go into credit card debt to “free” themselves of want.

“I am free.” When I hear someone speak these words—and other phrases are more commonly used —I have to examine the context of their statement. I rejoice with a person when they are freed from sickness, disease, the bondage of sin, addiction, needless worry, depression, etc. However, I feel differently when people “free” themselves of responsibility, moral character, thrift, conscience, truth, values, etc.

All sin presents a false front of freedom. Thus, I cannot make a decision based on promised freedom—I must use other criteria to make the best decisions in my life.

Struggle Yesterday

Being gay and a Church-active, chastity-abiding LDS guy presents interesting challenges. I struggle with loneliness and depression at times. For some reason, yesterday was particularly bad for me. In the evening, I got on my knees and pleaded with God for help. When I was done, I didn't feel any differently. I decided to be productive by doing some cleaning around the house. About 45 minutes later or so, I felt much better.

I am glad God will help us through our trials. I am happy to know I can call on Him for help when I need it.

Ethics and Homosexuality

To read my thoughts on this topic, visit my post at Northern Lights.