Fewer Comments from Me
My Silence
I have not followed and commented on many blogs lately (the past few months) as I have in the past. Why? I think L’s comment on a recent blog largely states how I feel.
“One is that I want so desperately for you to be happy that I feel like commenting somehow increases my stake in how things turn out, and that makes me afraid.”
I am happy to be of support, offer comments, and help other people if they want. However, I think that far too often my unsolicited comments haven’t been useful or helpful. It’s not healthy for me to invest time and emotion in a situation when I have no influence on the outcome.
People are free to make their own choices, and I am grateful we all have our own agency. I’m not trying to have a pity party for myself because my comments aren’t appreciated. That’s not how I feel. I simply have a finite number of resources, including time and emotional resources. Spending a lot of time and emotion making a lengthy comment on a blog which is largely ignored does not do any good to anybody.
Once again, I am happy to offer my support, opinions, and comments to people who find them beneficial. If you feel I have let you down by not commenting the past couple months, feel free to send me an email and let me know. Otherwise, I am far less inclined to randomly offer comments/advice/suggestions.
I will still follow some blogs out there, so keep writing.
posted by Chris W. @ 12:18 PM
3 comments
3 Comments:
Chris, I was so glad to see a comment from you on my blog today. Of course you are always welcome to quote me on your blog, even if only to say, "this really arrogant guy once said...". ;-)
I've had to ask myself why I blog on multiple occasions. It takes much more out of me than I realized it would, and sometimes it doesn't seem worth it. For me, it has three purposes. One, I like writing and thinking through things--commenting to point out fallacies or show appreciation for thoughtful effort (or deliberately tolerant effort). Two, it allows me to offer insights I have into this experience very few people share (of being SSA and LDS). Some have expressed appreciation for this and it seems like a kind of service. Three, it is actually therapeutic in the sense that I am studying the issue and journaling through my past and present to help me understand my situation and how to go forward with my challenges.
Sometimes none of these really seem to be adequate to justify it. But, other times it seems quite gratifying. You, my friend, exemplify one of those times. I appreciate your faith and support.
Please feel free to comment whenever you feel the desire. I would love to hear from you no matter what!
But more than a comment, I would love to read as many blog entries as you want to write. I truly appreciate your stuggle and approach to this homosexuality issue. The things you have to say are really important, and it means a lot to be able to read them and connect with what you are saying, even if your experiences aren't mine.
I always look forward to reading what you have to say. Thanks so much for your comments.
I have a few friends that ssa and I really care about them a lot. I've been trying hard to understand their feelings and see what they are going through. I just wanted to see that I am so impressed with your additude and the positive outlook you chose to take. I'm not one who struggles with a ssa trial, but you definetly have inspired me to wanted to be a better person. THanks!
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